Last week, I hinted that I would be removing my profile from the free site I was on
5 years ago
I have been too lazy (or should I say busy?) to do it yet, but when I get round to it my profile is going to be a thing of the past. The calibre of men on there is just not up to scratch, and I’m not referring to looks or anything, but the sheer, shocking lack of effort. Only a couple of the men on there who have messaged me have actually written anything at all! It seems to me like they have just sent the ‘Hi’ template to hundreds of women who look at all passable, like some annoying take-away flier you get through your door. I really can’t even be bothered to reply. Hell, there’s not even anything to reply TO! I’ve had more conversation before with men who are asleep! Boundaries are abounding. Though I suppose, this one is not so much a boundary as sheer common sense. Don’t respond to someone who has sent you a template as a come-on. It’s like those annoying texts you get on New Year’s Eve. You just know the same thing has been sent to everyone in their ‘phonebook, no selection at all. So when I get around to it, the free sites are not seeing me for dust.
Not that there’s much action on the paying one to be quite frank! I did go on my first date, so I suppose you could call that progress. There is definite progress in the development of my self-esteem following this encounter. He took one look at me and I could read in his face instant disappointment, which actually made me smile. What made me smile even more is that during the whole thing he was looking at his watch. Could you BE more transparent? I didn’t particularly fancy him either, but still it was I who kept the conversation going by asking lots of questions, because that-is-how-you-get-to-know-people. But the thought that was probably running through his head was ‘I don’t fancy her so what’s the point getting to know her?’ Fair play, but really, is that all it’s about? I suppose it is for some people, but I am interested in meeting people of all sorts.
The person with whom I was most impressed on this date was, in fact, me. I took it on the chin that he was quite obviously disappointed, shy, could only make eye contact for a small fraction of the time and found it difficult to make conversation (or, to be fair, didn’t have the motivation) and that quite frankly he couldn’t wait to go. I must admit I sadistically asked if he wanted another drink to test if he would have the courage to go early. I talked about all the 80s bands I’d been to see and admitted that some of my friends are (Shock! Horror!) eccentric. What the hell? I’m in a phase of my life where, frankly, what someone thinks of me is a bit immaterial. And this is not because I disregard other people’s preferences and feelings, but because I feel secure in the knowledge that I am a good person, and that all my friends think I am top banana and never EVER look at their watches when we’re chatting! It’s a pretty good place to be..........
So this may be the end of the road for me with internet dating. I’ve paid for six months but to be honest the joke is already wearing pretty thin, and I am actually wondering whether life has to be this dull, or whether, like they used to say in ‘Why Don’t You’, I should go out and do something less boring instead........
Speak live with a case manager now.